You guys. I destroyed my crock pot.
Last night I used it to make pulled BBQ chicken for dinner. And then I forgot to turn it off. And went out for the evening. And returned five-ish hours later to a Caramelization Situation.
Cooked on barbeque sauce does not smell good. Or look good. Especially with little pieces of shredded chicken all embedded in it like pebbles in asphalt. I was sure I'd spend most of today chipping away at the cooked on gunk with a hammer and chisel. Before giving up and asking Ryan to do it because "Oh, sorry, I didn't get to the crockpot, kids were NUTS, you know how it goes. Would you mind cleaning that out for me?"
But I figured out how to clean it with hardly any effort at all. You probably already know about this, but let's pretend I figured it out all on my own, OK?
I went to Goodwill and bought a new one. Just kidding.
I filled the crockpot half full of boiling water then mixed in a quarter cup of Borax and stirred.
Then I stepped back and let the toxic cloud do it's thang.
Believe me when I say toxic cloud. That thing steamed way longer than it should have. Don't worry I didn't inhale.
You have to wait a while. This is a good time to check out the local real estate listings for houses with an open indoor area the size of a basketball court with a wipeable concrete floor. Something to accommodate the children, who keep getting taller and taller and ganglier and rough-housier. (If you see any listings send them my way).
After twenty-five-ish angsty minutes of picturing yourself in a home that looks beautiful only because it is not currently occupied by three human tornadoes, return to the crockpot.
Dump the Borax-boiling water solution (which now looks like a tasty au jus sauce) into the sink.
Do some minimal scrubbing to get in the corners. And done.
That's it. And if you don't tell your spouse, he will probably think you worked really hard on it. And thank you profusely. And that's when you show him that listing with the basketball court.